Where I Began…

To know how I got to where I am now, you must know from where I began. From my first blog, you know that I did not grow up knowing the Lord. My family would tell people they were ‘Christian’ but there was no reading the Bible in our home, no teaching us about anything having to do with Christianity. From other relatives, I learned that when my mother was young, her grandmother died and it was then she stopped believing in God. My father seemed to see Christians as the crazy, bible-thumpers some portray them to be. So we practiced all the holidays but I knew very little about the true meaning of those holidays.

As I grew up, I had the desire inside of me to learn about the Lord. The babysitter took us to Vacation Bible School and I loved it. However, I remember visiting friends’ churches and they didn’t feel good to me. I started thinking I was evil because I would go into a church and feel an overwhelming sense that I didn’t belong there. Once I became an adult, I started searching for whatever the ‘truth’ was. I read tons of new-age books. I tried a little of almost every belief system out there.

I’m not happy about the beliefs that I practiced before now, but I’m not ashamed either. The devil is a deceiver and well let’s be honest, he’s REALLY good at it! And and why shouldn’t he be, after having thousands of years to perfect it. The first non-Christian thing I tried was when I was about age 20. In a moment of anger toward the Lord, I told him that I didn’t want to talk to him anymore. I was tired of not understanding the Bible, not having answers to my questions. I told him to go and actually ‘felt’ him leave. Until that moment I didn’t realize how connected I actually was to him! I felt empty but my anger persisted. I started hearing another voice in my head that I KNEW was evil. I told it that if it could do ‘anything’ as it claimed, then have my ex-boyfriend appear in front of me. (I was driving in my car as I said that.) Moments later, a car pulled in front of me and at the next stop light I realized that it was indeed my X! I was shocked and scared! I returned home and repented to the Lord and he joined me again immediately.

After that I never again turned toward the darkside, but I still didn’t think that I knew ‘the truth’. I went to new-age workshops, I had past-life regressions (I was SURE that reincarnation was real!), I went to see a channeler, and the list goes on. I started reading every book I could get my hands on and that included the Bible. I believed in God, but thought that maybe Jesus was just a ‘prophet’. I wasn’t sure. I didn’t know how much of the Bible was actually metaphor and how much was just plain facts. In my late 20s, I dated a preacher’s son and he was more screwed up than me. I don’t remember what denomination he came from, but let’s just say that having him in my life did more harm for my Christianity than good. During the time I dated him, I had given away all of my ‘sinful’ books (non-Christian) but after him, I had to buy more because I was still searching for the truth. And I thought that I had finally found it at about age 30 with “The Law of Attraction”.

I started reading what are called the ‘Seth books‘. A woman supposedly channeled an ‘entity’ named Seth a who answered lots of questions posed to him. I also really got into the Law of Attraction by reading the ‘Abraham‘ books. Here was again, another channeled entity and this one talked all about the Law of Attraction, among other things. Anyway, whatever was being said in those books got through to me. I was praying to God but trying to use the Law of Attraction at the same time. What a disaster! I would pray and believe that God would answer my prayers because I was using the ‘Law’ to try and make things happen.

I was deep into this crap for a long time. Then one day the devil overplayed his hand. I started noticing a pattern. I would spend weeks thinking happy thoughts about some changes I wanted to see in my life, but NOTHING happened. And then literally, the very second I thought something bad, it happened immediately. That voice in my head (that I know now was not the Lord) said, “see that! you did that! you made that happen because you thought something bad!” Then it hit me. I said, “that doesn’t make sense. I think good thoughts over and over for weeks upon weeks and get nothing, and I think one bad thought and BAM! bad thing happens fast as lightning!” Hmmm.. something smells fishy! I had finally begun to see the deceit in it all!

My boyfriend at the time, who is now my husband, had waited patiently until this day when I told him that I think my beliefs are screwed up. I told him what happened and he explained to me about how the devil is a great deceiver. I knew it was the truth because things started happening in my life that told me I was on the right path. I could ‘feel’ the anger of the demons. I heard snake hissing sounds in my bedroom, and lots more bizarre things happening. I had found the truth I had been searching for and continue to this day to learn more and experience more from our Lord! I will have lots more details of that in upcoming blogs!

The Parable of the Workers in the Vineyard

The parable of the workers in the vineyard, as told in Matthew 20:1-16, is one of my favorite parables in the Bible.  For those that don’t know, Jesus often spoke in parables to help his disciples better understand, and remember, what he was teaching them.  I find this true even today, as most of my life I have used analogies and parables when explaining things.

This parable is about a landowner hiring workers for his vineyard.  The landowner hired workers throughout the day, at different times.  However, no matter when they were hired, he told them how much they would earn (which turned out to be the same amount.)  Some had worked all day and some had worked for only an hour.  But at the end of the day, they all received the same payment.

The vineyard represents the Kingdom of Heaven, and we, all of us, represent the workers.  It does not matter whether you grew up knowing the Lord or whether you just met him yesterday;  You still will go to Heaven when you die and be with the Lord.  The workers that came in and only worked for one hour are often referred to as ’11th hour workers’, hence the name of my blog.  Your rewards in Heaven might be different from those that have been serving the Lord all their lives.  But whether you just accepted Jesus as your Lord and Savior today, or have known Him all your life, you will still go to Heaven when you die.

I see myself as an ’11th hour worker’ because I was nearly 40 years old before I found the Lord.  My parents did not go to church, nor have any Christian background to teach my sister and me.  I was a teenager when my mother decided to join a Catholic church, so I grew up with very little understanding of who God and Jesus were and what the Bible was all about.  I always worried that people who had a strong Christian upbringing would be held in higher esteem by the Lord.  But through this parable, Jesus was very clear that was not the case!  What a wonderful message from the Lord!